Relationship Q&A with Coach Stephen

Check out the latest Q&A sitdown video I had with relationship coach Stephen Robinson!

I Have Lupus, Lupus Doesnt Have Me

I’m back! Yes, I know, it’s been a long time but whew! I have been battling a lot over the past few months.I went through a breakup, was diagnosed with Lupus, bought a house, suffered hair loss and lonliness, was in a car accident and truly battled depression for the first time in my life.But now, I feel much better about life and much more in control over my circumstances. However, I know that others are out there facing struggles as well and so because of that I want to share my story with you. You are not alone and I pray God continues to strengthen and encourage you on your own journey.

Q3’2018 Goals Update

Walking into this last quarter of the year like: Yaaasssss!!!

Hey Loves, it’s your girl Videllia and it’s time for your quarterly goals check in!!! As you all know, every quarter, I take some time to pause and reflect on the goals that I have set for the year. I celebrate the ones I’ve accomplished, add any new ones, remove ones that are no longer relevant to me and evaluate where my progress is on my remaining goals. I show you all a running list from my new year’s post so that you can see these goals being crossed off!

As a reminder, here was my theme for this year:

Dream ♥ Hustle ♥ Achieve

So let’s get to it…

Blog Goals

My blog goals include:

  • New Website  COMPLETE
    • As you all can see, I have redesigned my website to make it more user friendly.  Take some time to explore some of its categories like For Every Queen, Lady V speaks and more to find what you like. I’m certain my site has something for every Queen out there.
  • New Products – COMPLETE
    • One of my goals last year was to design some statement tee’s for you all and I can finally say that is complete!  I recently launched the first of my new statement tee’s for this year specifically for all of my goal digger Queens.  Grab yours by purchasing here. I plan to release at least 2 more shirts this year so I’m sure you’ll find something for the Queen in you!
    • GOAL UPDATE Q2:  I have created and designed TWO shirts already this year so I made really good progress on this goal! I don’t know that I will create another t-shirt this year but will focus on selling the two that I’ve already created and work on creating some other freebies for my followers.
  • More Videos/Vlogs! – IN PROGRESS
    • The feedback that I received on my videos was very positive in 2017 (even though I had NO intention on ever starting a YouTube channel haha).  But I have been enjoying this journey and realized I love connecting with you all through video so look forward to seeing more frequent videos from me this year. If you haven’t already, be sure to sign up to follow me on YouTube. My goal is to post at least 3 new videos every month (hopefully more!)
    • GOAL UPDATE Q3: I have fallen off of posting new videos to my YouTube channel but have posted videos on my Instagram page for my new Relationship T.E.A. segment. People keep asking me for more videos and podcasts so I’m hoping to increase this over the next half of the year with my new Relationship T.E.A segment where I offer free dating advice on the questions YOU ask. Additionally, I’m hoping to create more podcasts for my Single Queens. You can head over to my Instagram page to see all of the funny Relationship T.E.A. videos and podcasts that I’ve posted so far. 
  • More Giveaways! – COMPLETE
    • Who doesn’t like receiving free stuff?!!  I plan to host at least 3-4 giveaways this year and they will be bigger and better than last year so stay tuned!  Some giveaways may only be announced on Instagram while some only announced on YouTube so be sure you’re signed up to follow all of my platforms. My first giveaway was posted earlier this month on Instagram.
    • GOAL UPDATEQ2: As of the date of this post, I’ve hosted three giveaways – one in January, one in February and one in April. I am also doing another giveaway on my Instagram RIGHT NOW through this Saturday for a chance to win a Goal Digger Gang t-shirt. If you aren’t following me on Instagram you are missing out on a LOT of great giveaways! Head on over to enter now. So technically, I’ve already achieved this goal (so I’m gonna cross it off! But I more than likely will still host at least one more giveaway before the year is up!)
    • GOAL UPDATE Q3 – I’ll be hosting another giveaway next month for my birthday so make sure you stay tuned!
  • More Collaborations – IN PROGRESS
    • I love collaborating with other bloggers/vloggers.  I’m hoping to do more collaborations this year and would love to do another collab with a vlogger.  I would like to do at least 3 collaborations this year so if interested, hit me up!
    • GOAL UPDATEQ2: I’ve done two collaborations so far – one with the beautifully talented Keyva Jo Fontnette and one with Nelly’s Couch on offering dating advice so I only have 1 more to do to reach my target for the year. To see my fashion collaboration with Keyva, click here.
    • GOAL UPDATE Q3 – I’m currently partnering with someone right now working on my final collaboration for this year! Be looking out for it coming in this last quarter.
  • More Series – COMPLETE
    • Last year I introduced you all to my #KnowYourWorth series in February. I hope to do at least 2 more mini-series this year with you all. My next series is specifically for my single Queens and will be posted next month!
    • GOAL UPDATE Q3: I hosted my single series in February. It was a week long devotional study for my single Queens. I don’t know that I’ll be hosting another series as I have so many segments already on my page. I am however, working on a 5-10 minute downloadable course about love that I plan to offer either in Q4 or Q1 of next year!
    • As a result of my series in February, I’ve decided to do a monthly podcast for single Queens. In the podcast we will be talking all about single-lady ish! Please send me what topics you’d like to hear! I’m kicking it off on Monday, April 2nd with a giveaway! Click here to learn more.
    • GOAL UPDATE: I moved this from Saturdays to the last Monday of every month and just posted my first podcast this week! You can find that podcast here. Additionally, this allowed me to narrow down my target audience and you all love to hear about relationships! So on my Instagram and Facebook pages – I post weekly relationship advice, relationship videos, date night ideas for the single ladies and those in relationships, dating and relationship questions AND the Single Sistah podcast. So if you need to be inspired in the love department be sure to check out my Instagram and Facebook pages!
  • Updated Blog Schedule and Content COMPLETE
    • To ensure that I am posting consistent content for you all on a weekly basis, I have created a blog posting schedule to include:  one minute motivational videos, business/blog/entrepreneur tips, more travel, fashion and beauty blogs, career and finance tips, #WCW Queen Spotlight features and more!
  • Growth and visibility goals for Instagram and YouTube
    • While it’s not all about the numbers, I do have goals to expand my reach on both Instagram and YouTube as I have selected these as my two primary social media platforms for 2018.  Wish me luck!
    • GOAL UPDATE: I have grown my IG account by 450 followers since January 1, 2018!!! My YouTube channel has grown to over 80 followers. Baby steps but I’m loving the progress so far!
  • Miscellaneous
    • Finalize my KnowYourWorth book.  Finalize my Singles book by December 2018. (Decided to change which book I would focus on this year) – IN PROGRESS
    • Create blog business cards. – COMPLETE IN Q3


Some of my personal goals include:

  • Spiritual
    • This year, I want to spending more time with God not only in scripture but in prayer as well.  I’m trying to incorporate daily prayer and devotional time with God as well and I’m tracking my progress.
    • GOAL UPDATE: I have been up and down on my spiritual goal. One thing I know I need to do is incorporate more prayer time and not just devotional time. I’m working on it. 🙂
  • Healthy-ish Lifestyle (don’t judge! haha)
    • I want to work out at least 3-4 times/week and incorporate more vegetarian meals as well, eating at least one vegeterian meal a week!
    • I need to eat more green veggies. Lol. I actually love green veggies, I just don’t cook them as much as I should.  I also will be sharing more healthy-ish recipes with you all on my vlog this year so stay tuned.
    • GOAL UPDATE: I had to take a break for 2 months due to some health issues but I’ve been getting back into working out regularly again. I still need to work on incorporating at least one vegetarian meal to my weekly routine and I have some healthy vlogs coming soon.
  • Travel 
    • I have declared my 30th year to be my year of travel. So far I’ve been have to San Francisco and Puerto Rico and New Orleans. Currently I’m in London and Paris! Don’t worry, I’m taking you all with me and will be blogging/vlogging about those trips as well so head over to my IG page to see all of the travel adventures.
  • Miscellaneous
    • Read more books as well as books/resources to grow my business. – IN PROGRESS
    • Take a fun class. (This year I plan to take a weekly hip hop class. I’ve already started posting some of the videos on my Instagram so head on over to check them out).COMPLETE
    • Buy a house by the end of the year! (Yaasss, your girl got real goals!) – IN PROGRESS

What are some of your goals for this year?  What else would you like to see me do on my site this year?  Let’s be sure to pray for one another and keep each other lifted throughout this year!  ~Videllia

I Deserve the King of Wakanda

Hey loves, it’s Videllia. Your favorite relationship and motivational blogger and I’m back with another blog post called “I Deserve the King of Wakanda” and so do you.  You can listen to the podcast below or keep scrolling to read the full post.


Full Post:


I love the movie Black Panther. I saw it 3 times in theaters, once on an airplane and plan to buy the DVD lol. What I loved outside of the amazing storyline, great acting and eye candy was the way T’Challa treated the women in the movie, specifically Nakia.

For those that don’t know, in the storyline Nakia can be seen pursuing her own dreams of saving people while T’challa pursues her. Not only does he pursue her but he protects her. Not only does he protect her but he wants to provide for her. Not only does he provide for her but you can see how he loves and cherishes her. How he respects and admires her dreams and her vision for the world. Not only does he cherish her but you can see he makes her aware of his intentions. He hints at her being the Queen in Wakanda and to me their love relationship was so cute.


While it is fictional of course being based on fictional characters it really got me to thinking – I deserve the King of Wakanda. I deserve a T’challa. No not in the sense of I need a man to be able to transform into some amazing super hero and kick butt all across the world but in the sense of everything he stood for.

I deserve a man who pursues me.

I deserve a man who protects me.

I deserve a man who wants to provide for me (as I want to provide for him).

I deserve a man who loves and cherishes me, who respects and admires me and my dreams. Who will support me in my dreams and figure out ways to help me pursue those things just as T’Challa supported Nakia.

I deserve a man who makes his intentions known – who let’s me know that I’m the one he wants and the one he wants to be with.

And sis, I’m here to tell you, that you do too! We deserve the King of Wakanda. We deserve a king. Now we can fight over which one we get, you can take T’Challa and I can take Killmonger (he was a King for a little bit there lol) No but in all seriousness, I’m here to encourage you to start believing that you deserve better than what you’ve been getting from these lames out here. If that man isn’t pursuing you with intention, isn’t protecting your heart, not showing you the love of God or treating you according to your worth, then that man just may not be the King God has designed for you.

You have to learn to be strong enough to wait for God’s best. I believe that there is a man out there who was specifically designed just for you and you need to stay encouraged. Your King is coming! Wakanda Forever.

Alright Queens, I hope that encourages you! And as always, be sure to like, comment, subscribe and share with a friend! Together, let’s empower one another to be Queens.