Here’s a quick post on how I feel about the latest events in our great country…
America-land of the free, home of the brave. We’re the country so many others want to flock to but for what?! I can’t even sleep peacefully anymore because I fear that someone I know, family or friend, will be the next “hashtag”. Whenever my mom calls me, I hold my breath, and often start any conversation that sounds like it’s going to be bad with “Mom, before you start, is everyone up there still alive?” Literally, yesterday, my mom called me and was like are you sitting down? I felt my heart race as I gathered enough strength to ask her if my brothers, cousins and other family members were safe. (Fortunately, it was just some bad news but was not bad news that related to death of any of my family.)
The fact that even my own mom calling me has me living in fear is such a sad life to live. Yes, I stay prayed up and pray for my brothers and cousins constantly but that doesn’t take away those feelings. In all of my 28 years of existence, these last few have taught me more about racism in America than I could ever read in a textbook. I’m so thankful for my ancestors fighting for our civil rights and liberties but who knew that we would still have to fight to continue to have them?
When this first started happening years ago, I must admit, I was desensitized. It didn’t affect me personally so I felt sad for the moment and once the moment was over, I continued forward with my life. I mean, surely it was going to stop right? There was no way justice wouldn’t prevail. Trayvon Martin, Michael Brown, Sandra Bland, Freddie Gray, Eric Garner, Tamir Rice, and the little black girl who was beat up by police right here in my home state of Texas – surely there was no way these cops would not be found guilty? And now we add to the list Alton Sterling and Philandro Castile. And these are just the incidents that I can recall – by far not the number of innocent lives that have been taken far too soon. I know I say “innocent” and some people will bring up these individuals pasts or try to make them out to be these vicious human beings with a background that justifies the actions of these cowardly cops; however, if you are compliant with what a cop asks you to do, are unarmed, and are not dangerous, you are definitely INNOCENT.
With each new death of an innocent black person, I find that I’m outraged and saddened…gone is the desensitization that I once had. That is why I had to write this post. I don’t usually speak out about things like this, but this “ish” is out of control!! I sign petitions and support peaceful protests but something’s gotta give. I’d love to live in the America my ancestors fought so hard for. The TRUE America. The America that so many other people from all over the world flock to live and prosper. The America that is truly the land of the free. The America that will finally recognize the equality of ALL human beings. Hell, the America that will recognize that black people ARE indeed human beings. And we deserve the same respect, justice and civil liberties granted to all of those around us.
Black Lives Matter. Why? Because ALL LIVES (should) MATTER.
Point. Blank. Period.
My prayers to the families and friends of those once again victimized by police brutality. Justice needs to prevail…is it sad that I fear that it wont?
#AltonSterling #PhilandroCastile
-Videllia
OnlyLadyV 
I truly can’t understand how you feel either because I am in Texas and some of my best friends are black and one of my cousins is married to a black man. I don’t like what is happening and not understanding it breaks my heart because how can anyone be racist. My mom and dad and my Savior taught me different.
I can never agree though with the happenings in these protest demonstrations where they get out of control throwing and burning and other destructive things and hate words and hate signs. The Dallas demonstration was one that could have been one to follow but then someone who was racist decided to change history. As a white person it causes me to be as scared as you because I see racism growing so much against me as I get older.
It has to start with me and you and this generation has to do something to change future generations. We have to love each other even during these times and keep our focus on Jesus.
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I completely agree. I was in Dallas when the tragic events unfolded. It equally makes me scared to even attend peaceful protests at times because one may never know how it will end. I share my words through writing in hopes that someone can at least be touched by it and it embarks some change because like you said, it has to start with our current generation or it will progressively get worse. I shared with my friends that in my family, “color” is not a thing. My brothers both have interracial children and so is my little sister. What we were taught is that people should be treated fairly. All people. That’s what I want our generation to understand. That we must treat each other the way we want to be treated. Love each other as God has loved us. I think if everyone can begin to keep their focus on God and love according to God’s will then there will be so much less hate and racism. It’s a long shot but with Jesus leading the way, I know it can be possible :). Thank you for reading and sharing your words. Healthy discussions like these are so essential in our communities today.
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I will never know how you feel but after reading your posting I can now understand why you feel this way, thank you for an excellent posting.
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And I appreciate you for reading. Thank you for your kind words as well.
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